"Tricky Business" by Dave Barry (2002)

 

This book was one of the "$2.99 Kindle specials" that I get in my email every day.  It looked interesting, but for some reason I was too cheap to spring for the two-ninety-nine so I did something that I should do more often:  I got the book out of the library.

Take a crummy past-its-prime cruise ship, retro fitted and turned into a gambling ship that leaves the Florida coast every night and sails behind the three mile limit to suck money out of tourists and local suckers.  Throw in a lousy house band, a down on her luck cocktail waitress, two hilarious senior citizens (picture Morty Seinfeld and Jack Klompus from "Seinfeld"), and assorted mobsters, drug runners, money launderers, and other only-in-Florida characters, put them on this tub of a ship and send it out into the Gulfstream as a tropical storm is raging - and a theme throughout the book is the hilarious dead-on over the top coverage that a local television news team provides during this weather "emergency" -  and what you've got is a comic crime novel of classic proportions.

Keep in mind that this book was published in 2002, so some references may be dated.  For example, with casinos now being so ubiquitous, who needs a ship that sails into international waters every night to be able to gamble?  That's just nitpicking, though.  It took me all of two days to read this one, and there were times where I was shrieking out loud with laughter.  You probably would too!

Three Stars from The Grandstander.

Shirt Pocket Notes

 Pirates

When last we wrote of the Pittsburgh Pirates, they were just completing a nine game road trip leading up to the All-Star Break, a road trip wherein they complied a scintillating record of 1-8.  Rested and refreshed from their four day vacation, they began the nominal second half of the season by losing three straight games at home to the Chicago While Sox, one of the few teams in MLB who just might be worse than they are.  Baseball being the funny game that it is, they them swept three games from the Detroit Tigers, a team that at the start of that series had the best record in all of MLB.  Go figure.  There then followed an off day and then a home game last night against the Diamondbacks where they lost 1-0 in eleven innings while amassing the grand total of one (1) hit over the course of those eleven innings.

Bucco skipper Don "Donnie" Kelly came up with the quote of the year in his post game presser:  "You're not going to win many games when you only get one hit."

Yep.

Don "Donnie" Kelly

Master of Understatement

All that awaits the Buccos now is to see who will be traded at the July 31 trade deadline, where the Pirates will definitely be sellers.  Adam Frazier has already been traded to the Royals for, are you ready for this?, a 28 year old middle infielder who was immediately assigned to Indianapolis.  I can't remember his name and can't be bothered to look it up, because, really, is it ever going to really matter?

My predictions as to who will NOT be on the team after July 31:  Mitch Keller and David Bednar for sure.  Dennis Santana probably be a 75% chance of getting traded., and 50% chance that Brian Reynolds and Ke'Bryan Hayes will also be gone.  Spare parts like Isiah Kiner-Falefa, Tommy Pham, and Andrew Heaney also most likely will be dealt.

The question is, will GMBC be likely to get good or even decent value for quality guys like Keller, Bednar, and Reynolds?  His track record for the last six years on this front has been.....not good.

Steelers

In what is close to a High Holy Day in The Burgh, the Steelers opened training camp at St. Vincent College in Latrobe this week. The big news of the week, though was signing T.J.Watt to a contract extension that will make him the highest paid non-quarterback in League history (a mark that will probably stand until Jerry Jones signs Micah Parsons to a new contract sometime before the season opens).  So, Aaron Rodgers has signed on to be the QB, Watt is under contract, and the media has now turned to their next favorite topic:  How hot should the seat upon which Mike Tomlin's ass rests be?  Seems the guys with the microphones and keyboards just can't wait to see Tomlin get fired.

The Rodgers signing got all of the press over the off-season but moves acquiring DK Metcalf, Jalen Ramsey, and Jonnu Smith combined with the rookies that were drafted in April would make it seem that this will be an interesting season for the Steelers.  My expectations were not high for the 2025 season for Rooney U, but they have ramped up a bit after the Rodgers signing and the Fitzpatrick-for-Ramsey-and-Smith trade.  It all hinges on what Rodgers has left in the tank.  If he can play at a level of, say, 75% of his prime, I'll sign up for that today.

In other Steelers news, the team announced today the 2025 Inductees into their Hall of Honor: Ben Roethlisberger, Maurice Pouncey, and Joey Porter.

Certainly can't argue with any of those choices.

Jeopardy

It has been a fun three weeks or so watching Scott Riccardi steamroll his way through 16 consecutive wins on Jeopardy and earnings of over $455,000 during his 16 game streak, the tenth longest in Jeopardy history.  All of this made it all the more confounding when Riccardi lost last night by answering a relatively easy Final Jeopardy question incorrectly.  "Who was William Randolph Hearst?" was the correct response, and Riccardi guessed "Howard Hughes".  Unbelievable.

I am thinking that we have not seen the last of Scott Riccardi as Jeopardy rolls out their various "tournaments" involving past champs.

The Absent Friends Quartet

There has been a preponderance of celebrity deaths in recent weeks, and probably none of these deaths on their own would merit the Absent Friends treatment from The Grandstander.  However, when they are stacked right on top of each other like so much cordwood, well, as Willie Loman's wife said in Death of a Salesman, "attention must be paid."   So, here you go, four shorter the usual Absent Friends tributes.

Was I a fan of former teenie-bopper idol, Tiger Beat cover boy, actor, and bubblegum rocker Bobby Sherman?  No, I was not.   Inexplicably, my friend Dan was and remains a huge Bobby Sherman fan, so I know that he will be happy with this post.  

Sherman died last month at the age of 81, and his obituaries told the story of what happened when the Show Biz lights went out for him.  Sherman devoted himself to a career in public safety.  I will let this entry from his Wikipedia page tell the story:

In 1974, Sherman guest-starred on an episode of the Jack Webb television series Emergency! ("Fools", season 3, episode 17, aired January 19, 1974), and found a new calling. Eventually, he left the public spotlight and became a paramedic. He volunteered with the Los Angeles Police Department, working with paramedics and giving CPR and first aid classes. He became a technical Reserve Police Officer with the Los Angeles Police Department in the 1990s, a position he still held as of 2017.^[8] For more than a decade he served as a medical training officer at the Los Angeles Police Academy, instructing thousands of police officers in first aid and CPR. He was named LAPD's Reserve Officer of the Year in 1999.

Sherman also became a reserve deputy sheriff in 1999 with the San Bernardino County Sheriff's Department, continuing his CPR and emergency training of new deputy hires. He retired from the sheriff's department in 2010.^[8]

Sherman and his wife co-founded the Brigitte & Bobby Sherman Children's (BBSC) Foundation.^[17] The foundation's mission is to provide motivated students in Ghana with a high-quality education and music program, and to provide tools to pursue higher education.

Sherman's singing and acting career made him famous and wealthy, but what he did after all of that made him a pretty neat guy.

Connie Francis died at the age of 87 last week.  A teenaged singer from New Jersey, Francis, like so many others of her era, was discovered by Dick Clark and his American Bandstand show when it was based in Philadelphia in the late nineteen fifties and sixties.  She had hit records with such songs as "Who's Sorry Now", "Stupid Cupid", "Lipstick On Your Collar", and "Where The Boys Are", the title tune of a movie in which Francis co-starred.  Like so many others of her era, her career as a mainstream pop star pretty much ended when The Beatles arrived in America.

Interesting item from her obituaries.  The complete and total love of her life was singer Bobby Darin,  However, Connie's father showed up one day with gun and threatened to shoot Darin unless he got out of his daughter's life.  Bobby took the hint and scrammed, although the torch for him still burned within her.  Connie Francis was married four time and, according to her, only hubby number three as any good at all.

Ozzy Osbourne

1948-2025

Like I said at the beginning, this is a death I would not have noted but for the fact that it was bunched together with all the others.  Back Sabbath and Ozzy the solo artist were not my bag, music-wise, nor did I ever watch that reality show that he did with his family.  I did like him on that commercial where he and others admonish business people for proclaiming themselves "rock stars."  That's a pretty good bit.

Oh, and he once bit the had off of a live bat on stage.

Hulk Hogan

1953-2025

When I worked at Equitable Life back in the 1980's, one of my co-workers was a huge fan of professional wrestling, and so it came to pass that for a period of four or five years, I too, became a follower of the pro wrestlers that populated the World Wrestling Federation. now the WWE, and I admit to attending many of the monty Wrestling cards that were held at the Civic Arena back in the day.  So, yes, I can say that I have seen Hulk Hogan perform live and in person on more that one occasion, and, yes, I did see him lift up and bodyslam Andre the Giant inside the squared circle at the Arena.  Hogan died yesterday at the age of 71.   Pro Rasslin' made him famous and wealthy,  but not without some bumps along the path.  I won't recount this incidents here; you can read all about them in his obits.  He also turned into a MAGA-head.

RIP Bobby Sherman, Connie Francis, Ozzy Osbourne, and Hulk Hogan.

Let me leave you with THIS PERFORMANCE Of "Where The Boys Are" by Connie Francis on the Ed Sullivan show in 1961, her salad days.  She was pretty good!

Oneil Cruz, The Home Run Derby, and the Pirates at the All-Star Break

The Pirates Oneil Cruz, despite being eliminated in the semi-finals of Major League Baseball's Dunk Contest Home Run Derby, made quite an impression in the event last night.  The Post-Gazette made a huge deal of it this morning, and it is all over social media that not only did Cruz hit 34 HOME RUNS in the contest, he also hit THE LONGEST HOME RUN (513 FEET), and NINE OF THE TEN LONGEST HOME RUNS, and THE TOP FIVE LONGEST HOME RUNS in the contest.  Can you just imagine how Greg Brown and Joe Block will be slobbering all over this when the Pirates return to action on Friday?

Yes, I watched the HRD, and yes, I was rooting for Cruz, and yes, it was fun to see the rockets that were launched by Cruz and all of the other participants.  However, let's keep this in perspective here:  this was a glorified batting practice session, albeit one with the added pressure a time clock and a $1 million prize to the winner.  It also brings into perspective the conundrum that is Oneil Cruz.  He does have prodigious power, he is very fast, but he strikes out a lot, is not a very good hitter, and he is a disaster defensively, and he tends to loaf sometimes (although maybe he won't loaf anymore since Don "Donnie" Kelly recently benched him for two whole innings for not running out a ground ball).

He does hit mammoth home runs more than occasionally, but let's put even that into perspective.  Here are Cruz's stats at the All-Star Break:

Home Runs - 16, tied for 43rd in all of MLB

RBI - 37, tied for 117th in all of MLB

Strike Outs - 116, tied for 3rd in all of MLB

BA - .212, 146th in all of MLB

OPS - .733, 96th in all of MLB

By contrast, the Mariners' Cal "The Big Dumper" Raleigh, the winner of the HRD, currently has 38 HR, 82 RBI, a .259 BA, and an OPS of 1.010.  He is also a Gold Glove catcher.  I include this paragraph not only for comparison purposes, but to also give me a reason to type out the best nickname in all of sports: The Big Dumper.

There is a reason why Cruz, a seemingly one trick pony, was at the Home Run Derby, but is not actually on the All-Star team.  I confess that I am confused in the matter of Oneil Cruz.  There is a mass of talent somewhere in there, but he is very far from being a complete ballplayer.  Willie Stargell, Roberto Clemente, and Dave Parker he ain't.

Now, as for the Pirates themselves.  What will probably be the high point of the season for them came on July 2 when they defeated the Cardinals 5-0. That was the third straight shutout of the Cards in that series, and it was the team's sixth straight win.  They then departed on a nine game road trip to Seattle, Kansas City, and Minnesota that would lead up the All-Star Break.  Would the team build upon that six game winning streak and create some momentum going into the second half of the season?  We all know that answer.  They lost eight straight games before salvaging a win on the final Sunday of the first half of the season.  They now sit at 39-58 on pace for a 97 loss season.  However, I for one am fully confident that they can pull off 100 losses in this, the sixth year of the Ben Cherrington Regime.

For reasons unknown to many, Cherrington remains the GM of the Pirates, and earlier this week he oversaw the Pirates selections in the MLB entry draft.  The Bucs used their first two picks to select a couple of high school pitchers:

1. Seth Hernandez, 19, RHP

2. Angel Cervantes, 17, RHP

Unless either of these guys are Paul Skenes 2.0, we won't see Hernandez in Pittsburgh until 2029, and it will be the 2030's before Cervantes arrives.

We now await the July 31 trade deadline to see what guys GMBC trades for some other teams' random middle infield prospects.

PIRATES FEVER. CATCH IT!

Travis Williams, Ben Cherrington, Bob Nutting

The Bucco Brain Trust

What, us worry?

"Superman" and "The Better Sister"

Hey, I just realized that it has been fourteen days since I last posted here.  No, I wasn't on vacation, and I wasn't sick.  Just not much has struck my fancy over the last two weeks, or did you want me to wax endlessly about how lousy the Pirates have been?  (Don't worry.  I do plan to write about the Buccos as we settle into the All-Star Break, but that will come later in the week.)  For today though, some Critical Commentary.

"Superman"

So this morning I made my $7.50 contribution to the $217 million in box office receipts racked up thus far for the new Superman movie.  Those who know me know that this is not my kind of movie, but what the hell, I gave in to the hype, and I have to say that I did enjoy it, although, it got a little silly - to me, anyway - as it went on for it's two hour length. 

The movie is also being criticized by those on the right end of the political spectrum as being too "Woke", and the movie certainly can be seen as an allegory for what we see happening in this country today, right down to the concentration camp facilities where "undesirables" are placed.  So, if you're a fan of the guy now residing in the White House, you've been warned.  And if you're not a fan of Felon47, you might ask "Can't I even go to a comic book movie to get away from what is going on the real world today?"

All that aside, I found the movie to be entertaining enough given that you have to suspend belief a bit and believe that "meta humans" from the planets exist.  David Corenswet, a likable enough hunk of beefcake with whom I was not familiar, although he does boast 23 other acting credits in IMDB, is fine as the Man of Steel.  Rachel Brosnahan, Mrs. Maisel herself, was quite good as Lois Lane, and she was charming.  She also had some of the best comic lines in the movie.  Some guy named Nicholas Hoult (again, someone with whom I am not familiar, but he seems to have been in a whole bunch Mad Max and X-Men types of movies, which would explain that) played Lex Luthor, and was totally hateable, so I guess that means he did a good job in the role.

The best character in the movie, though, was Krypto, the CGI dog.  He was even more charming that Ms. Brosnahan!  Maybe they'll do a feature movie about just him. I'd go see that one.

"Superman" gets Two and Three-Quarters Grandstander Stars.  

If you are a fan of these types of movies, though, you would probably rate it much higher.

"The Better Sister"

(This review contains NO SPOILERS.)

Linda and I just finished watching this eight part Amazon Prime mini-series last night. It is based upon a novel of the same name by Alifar Burke. I have read a number of books by Ms Burke, but not this one.  Perhaps if I had, I would have been able to make sense of the jumble that this series was.  It starred Elizabeth Banks and Jessica Biel as estranged sisters.  Banks was the trashy sister with addiction problems whose husband left her and took their infant son with him years ago.  Biel played the successful sister.  She was editor in chief of a fancy glossy fashion/lifestyle magazine, lives with her husband and son in a terrace apartment overlooking Central Park, while also having a gorgeous home in the Hamptons.  Oh, and she was married to her sister's ex-husband and raised her sister's son.  Got all that?

Well, the husband ends up getting murdered, the son gets arrested for the crime, and that is only the beginning of this fancy-shmancy melodrama.  The husband may also have been involved in some nefarious scheme with the crooked head of the law firm where he works.  There is an FBI agent who may be crooked, an aggressive lady detective who just KNOWS that these sisters just aren't what they seem and her partner who she constantly belittles, a protege of the victim who turns out to be more that just a friend to Biel, and a building doorman who also comes under suspicion.  And just who was Katherine, the African American lady who appears Biel's mentor?/boss?/friend?  Just who and what was she?  Neither of us could figure that out.

Yeh, it was a real dog's breakfast of characters and plot lines and after we were halfway through, we thought "Do we want to keep up with this?", but we slogged through it to the end.

Oh, and one other thing:  In the trial that took place in the show, the defendant, the kid, testified before every other witness did.  Does that ever happen in real life?  Isn't  the defendant usually the last witness to testify in any trial, if they even testify at all?

And how does the relationship between the two sisters resolve itself, and which sister ends up being the Better Sister?  You'll have to send eight hours of your life to find out.

Two Stars from The Grandstander on this one.

Two Movies

Two movies upon which to comment today.

I watched this one on Netflix this past weekend, and I highly recommend it.  It tells the story of how the BBC secured an interview in 2019 with Prince Andrew, Duke of York to discuss his relationship with well known sex predator and trafficker Jeffrey Epstein.  The movie stars Billie Piper and the young BBC producer who worked to get the interview, Gillian Anderson as the reporter who conducted the interview on the telly, and Rufus Sewall who plays the priggish and clueless Andrew.  If you know the story, you know that it was this interview that led to Andrew essentially being fired from his "job" as a Royal by his mummy, the Queen.

I give this movie Three and One-Half Grandstander Stars, and make this observation.  The way the British Royal Family is portrayed in movies and television - if only a third of it is actually true, then they are just a bunch of batshit crazy eccentrics.  I mean, what was with "Randy Andy" and the stuffed animals on his bed pillows?  The man was sixty years old at the time!

Last Sunday afternoon, Linda staged a surprise "Date Afternoon" for me.  I had no idea where we were going until we got to the place:

Yep, the Strand Theater in beautiful downtown Zelienople, PA was showing "Casablanca" on a big screen, and my perfect date was treating me to the perfect movie in a perfect setting.  I have written of "Casablanca" many, many times in this space,  just type "Casablanca" in the search box to verify that fact, so I won't go into detail about it again today.   If you've never seen it, then what in the hell is the matter with you?  Stop what you're doing now, find it on a streaming service, and watch it today.  And if you ever get the chance to see it (or any other classic movie for that matter) on a big screen in  theater, do so.  This is the third time that I have seen it in this manner.

In a 1992 book, "The Making of Casablanca", marking the fiftieth anniversary of the movie, author Aljean Harmetz includes this paragraph in the Preface:

"Cynicism is a necessary protective cost for those who come close to the film industry's seductively hot center, and I have needed a doubly thick coat.  I grew up on the outskirts of MGM where my mother worked in the wardrobe department, and I later wrote about Hollywood for the New York Times.  But my cynicism dissolves when Humphrey Bogart and Ingrid Bergman say goodbye at the airport, and, at least in the dark corner of a movie theater, I am sure that I would be capable of such a sacrifice too."

That is the essence of "Casablanca".  It is a perfect movie.

To Absent Friends - Dave Parker

 

One of the Pittsburgh Pirates All-Time Greats, Dave Parker, died this past weekend at the age of 74.  In a sad twist, Parker's death came one month before he was to be officially inducted into the National Baseball Hall of Fame.  In poor health for many years, at least Parker knew that he had finally made it to the Hall, even if he never got the chance to see his plaque hang in that Gallery in Cooperstown.

Here are the numbers.  In a 19 year career, Parker was a league MVP, a three time Gold Glove winner, two time batting champion, two time World Series champion, and seven time All-Star.  He hit .290 lifetime, with 2,712 hits, 339 home runs, and 1,493 RBI (.290/22 HR/98 RBI per 162 games).   In his eleven seasons with the Pirates from 1973-83, this numbers were .305, 166 HR and 758 RBI (.305/22 HR/94 RBI per 162 games).  

Those are the numbers, but you would have had to have actually seen Dave Parker when he first arrived in the big leagues to truly understand his impact.  He was big, 6'5", 230 pounds when ballplayers just weren't that big.  He was "Aaron Judge" before Aaron Judge was even born.  He was strong and fast.  A true five tool player.  

He was also brash and colorful, said what was on his mind, and humility was not his strong suit, as exemplified by this famous picture.  Oh, and by the way, this t-shirt can still be purchased at select retailers in the Pittsburgh area.

No one will say it out loud today, but Parker's personality was such that he was not always popular among the Pittsburgh fan base, and said fan base did not take kindly to the fact that Bucco management rewarded Parker with a five year, $5 million contract, making him baseball's first Million Dollar A Year player  (times were different back than).  Undoubtedly, racism played a part in the negative backlash that resulted whenever it was perceived that Parker was slacking or not putting out his best efforts.  No one will admit to that today, but, trust me, that was real.

Dave Parker eventually went the free agent route and signed with his hometown Cincinnati Reds, where he stayed for four years, and then spent five more seasons splitting time among the A's, Angels, Brewers, and Blue Jays.  

Parker also was a central figure in the "Pittsburgh Baseball Drug Trials" of the mid-1980's, and that further eroded his popularity among the Pittsburgh fan base,  However, sometime in the early part of the 21st century, the Pirates welcomed Parker back into the family, and he became a frequent visitor to PNC Park and team reunions and other Pirate Alumni events.  This was also at a time when Parker was diagnosed as having Parkinson's Disease, and his demeanor in the face of the disease as well as his efforts to raise funds for research were seen as heroic.

Dave Parker was the best player in baseball for an extended period of time in the late 1970's and early 1980's, and, all due respect to Willie Stargell, he was the best player on the Pirates World Series Champion team of 1979.  In the two days since his death, I have pondered the question "Have the Pirates had a better player than Dave Parker since he left the team in 1983?"  I suppose that you might be able to make a strong case for Andrew McCutchen, but if you had a choice who would you take for your team: an In-His-Prime-Parker of an In-His-Prime-McCutchen?  I love Cutch, but I'll take Dave Parker.

Dave Parker becomes the twelfth member of the 1979 We Are Fam-a-lee Pirates to die.  Fourteen members of the 1979 World Series roster remain with us.

	1979
Pitchers	Jim Bibby
	Bert Blyleven
	John Candelaria
	Grant Jackson
	Bruce Kison
	Dave Roberts
	Don Robinson
	Enrique Romo
	Jim Rooker
	Kent Tekulve
Catchers	Steve Nicosia
	Ed Ott
	Manny Sanguillen
Infielders	Tim Foli
	Phil Garner
	Bill Madlock
	Willie Stargell
	Rennie Stennett
Outfielders	Matt Alexander
	Omar Moreno
	Mike Easler
	Lee Lacy
	John Milner
	Dave Parker
	Bill Robinson
Manager	Chuck Tanner
	Deceased	12
	Still With Us	14

RIP Dave Parker.

(CORRECTION:  Since I originally posted this, it has been pointed out to me that Lee Lacy is still very much alive.  My apologies to him and all of his loved ones,)

The Thunder Rolls

Let us salute the Oklahoma City Thunder on their 103-91 Game 7 victory over the Indiana Pacers last night to secure the 2025 NBA Championship.  We also salute the League and Finals MVP Shai Gilgeous-Alexander who led the team to this championship.

It was a most entertaining Finals series, but the outcome will always carry a nagging "What if?' question for Pacers fans due to the first quarter injury to their star and best player, Tyrese Haliburton.  Haliburton started out on fire hitting three three point field goals before he popped his achilles midway through the first quarter and was lost for the rest of the game.

It was both sad and painful to watch as Haliburton lay on the floor for several minutes before he was able to get to the locker room.  I once heard the great Bill Russell, when he was working a TV commentator, say that "injuries are as much a part of this game as free throws", and that is certainly true.  The Thunder's title does not come with an asterisk because of Taliburton's injury.  As I stated on Facebook yesterday, I think that the Thunder is a better team, and that they probably would have won Game 7 regardless.  Still, the Pacers and their fans will have to always wonder "what if.....?'

I don't want to end this contemplation of the Finals without mentioning the Pacers' TJ McConnell.

McConnell is a local kid out of Chartiers Valley High School.  His father was and is a legendary high school coach at Char Valley. His aunt is Suzie McConnell-Serio, one of the great athletes to ever come out of western PA, and his sister was a star player at Duquesne and is now a rookie in the WNBA.  He started his college career at Duquesne before transferring to Arizona.  He was undrafted but has fashioned a nice little career as bench player and sixth man. In this series, he came off the bench and was effective in every game he played.  Coming into the game last night in place of Haliburton, he kept the Pacers in the game through the first half, before the Thunder just wore them out.  He is one of those types of players that are common in sport:  one that you love when he plays for YOU team, but one who drives you nuts when he plays for the other guys.

One more uplifting moment.  As the dejected Pacers came off the floor at the end of the game, Tyrese Haliburton, dressed and on crutches, was there to greet and console them in defeat.  It was an almost noble moment.

Again, all hail the OKC Thunder, worthy Champions!  And thanks to BOTH teams for a most entertaining and enjoyable Finals series.

 

To Absent Friends - Chuck Spatafore

In the course of your lifetime, if you are lucky enough, you will meet a small handful of people about whom you will say "I've never met anyone quite like him."  If you are really lucky, as I was, one of those persons that you will have encountered would have been Chuck Spatafore, who passed way peacefully this past Friday.  Chuck was never one to give his age, but he was somewhere in his early nineties.  If anyone can be said to have lived a full and rich life, it was Chuck.

I first met him in 1988 when I began working at Blue Cross of Western Pennsylvania.  Chuck and I were fellow Account Executives working in the area that sold to and serviced Taft Hartley Health and Welfare Trust Funds.  It didn't take me long to realize that this guy was one of the most engaging, and certainly one of the funniest, guys that I had ever met.   Chuck was a jazz drummer of renown in the greater Pittsburgh area, and he had worked as a professional musician throughout the country.  This "show biz" background allowed Chuck to accumulate a wealth of stories about many famous persons, both locally and nationally.  He also knew a million jokes, and could tell them in such a way that provoked great fits of laughter.  I can honestly say that Chuck was the funniest guy that I have ever known.

Here's just two stories that I loved hearing Chuck tell.  And I had him tell them to me many times.

In the mid-1960's, Chuck was the drummer in the house band at KDKA-TV Channel 2 in Pittsburgh,  Yes, local TV stations actually had such things as "house bands" back then.  One day, an up and coming rock and roll band from England came through town and needed to generate some publicity for their Pittsburgh gig, so they appeared on a local show down at Channel 2.  That group was the Rolling Stones.  (This was a long time ago.)  Anyway, the gist of the story was Chuck telling everyone how he got into it with "that skinny bastard Charlie Watts" as he, Watts, kept tinkering with Chuck's drum kit.  "I wanted to kill him and that would have been the end of the g.d. Rolling Stones."

Another time, Chuck was playing in the band at the old Holiday House night club when Milton Berle was the main act.  After one of Berle's jokes, Chuck gave a rim shot on his drums, whereupon Berle glared at him and said "I work alone, drummer."  Needless to say, Uncle Miltie was not one of Chuck's favorites.

Like I said, Chuck knew everybody.  He went to North Catholic with Dan Rooney, and played football at Dayton University with Chuck Noll.  So Chuck was connected to the Steelers.  He coached football at North Catholic High School with Tom Foerster.  Foerster went onto become an Allegheny Counter Commissioner and a major force in local Democratic politics, so this meant that Chuck was connected with just about any politico that mattered in the Pittsburgh area.  Among all of his connections  - show biz, sports, politics - Chuck knew just about everyone, and he usually had great story to tell about all of them.

Chuck retired from the Blues in 1996, and I am glad to say that he and I kept in touch, and every time we talked, the old stories would be told and I would be in tears with laughter.  Later this week, I will visit the funeral home to pay my respects to Chuck and his family, and I am certain that there will be more laughter than tears as everyone celebrates a full life that was certainly well lived.

I don't know who in his family composed the death notice for Chuck that appeared in the paper, but I want to quote from it here:

He inspired everyone who knew him to keep moving, keep smiling and keep going. Chuck was an extrovert in the best sense of the word. His joy for life was infectious, his storytelling legendary and his humor unmatched. No one could leave a conversation with him without a laugh, a grin or a new favorite anecdote. He had a deep love for his friends and family always bringing his signature warmth. Chuck Spatafore was a true original: a drummer, a teammate, a jokester, a gym rat, a sports fanatic, a dear friend, and a loving family man. He leaves behind a legacy of rhythm, resilience and joy. In lieu of flowers, the family asks that you honor Chuck by doing what he did best: tell a good story, listen to some great music and make someone laugh. 

A perfect description.

RIP Spats.

This picture was taken at a mini-reunion of the Blue Cross "Foster Plaza Gang" in 2014.  That's Chuck, front row, right.  Me on the left with Michelle Hickey Cerminara, who organizes these reunions, in the middle.  Ken Cikovic, Bill Hepfinger, and Judy Jones standing behind us.